Women find creative men very sexy. Male creativity trumps just about every other female attraction cue – a man who is funny need not be handsome to garner female attention.
In the bad old days of HUS, just the mere mention of hipster love among us women was enough to send the male middle agers’ tighty whiteys into a bunch. Inevitably, this led to indignant sputtering and criticism of Justin Bieber. Yet the females were usually in agreement. To us, the skinny, androgynous Orlando Bloom is far sexier than a Jean-Claude Van Damme *shudder*. In short, men and women get crushes on different types of men, but I’ve never understood why this sex difference is so pronounced.
In the book Mating Intelligence Unleashed by Kaufman and Geher, there’s an outstanding chapter on the mating value of creativity. It explains in great detail, via a large body of research why women especially value creative ability in a mate. Here’s why guys focused on physical bulk and prowess don’t get it:
The wonderfully complex and abstract qualities of the human mind that separate us from other beasts likely did not evolve solely because of their assistance in survival. How do the abilities to tell a clever anecdote, play a classical score on the piano without missing a note, sculpt an emotionally provocative piece of art, or write an articulate and interesting poem help in survival?
They don’t. These “high-level manifestations of creative intelligence have come to typify our species,” yet they do not require brute strength or skilled spear throwing. The answer lies in Darwin’s theory of evolution:
1. Natural selection selects for qualities that aid in survival.
The man who was “strong like bull” stood a better chance of survival than the brilliant writer with skinny arms. Surviving increases the likelihood of reproduction, but it doesn’t necessarily do anything to make you sexy to women.
2. Sexual selection selects for qualities that increase reproductive output.
A feature such as our ability to write poetry or fiction arose not because these skills helped in survival but rather because they helped in the domain of life that’s even more important than survival (from a Darwinian perspective): mating.
Darwin even concluded that before humans had language, we romanced one another with musical notes and rhythm.
Why is it that women go weak in the knees for creative types? What’s sexy about displays of creativity?
It turns out that creativity displays signal a bunch of stuff that women want in a mate. Geoffrey Miller’s research on courtship displays suggests that sexually selected mental indicators include qualities such as musical ability, drawing ability, humor and verbal ability. Importantly, these qualities vary a great deal from one individual to another. Women are choosy, and they need ways of distinguishing male traits. Obviously, “has 10 fingers and 10 toes” isn’t going to cut it. Creative display attracts women because it reveals the following heritable traits:
Extraverted personality
Relatively high intelligence
Ability to express emotions
Ability to obtain social status and resources
Research shows that creative men do have more sex partners. In fact, research by Nettle and Clegg reveals that professional artists and poets have twice as many sexual partners as men in other professions. Another study by Beaussart, Kaufman and Kaufman also found that people who engage in a wide variety of creative activities had a higher number of sexual partners. The link between creativity and mating success is very clear.
You may have heard of the study by Haselton and Miller that looked at the ovulatory cycles of women and their effect on female attraction. During their most fertile period, single women are more likely to have short-term encounters with men who display “good genes.” I was surprised to learn that the genes topping this list include those for creativity and intelligence, not high testosterone brawn. A study of ovulating female college students found that they preferred the creatively talented poor guy over the wealthy guy of average intelligence.
Skeptical male readers previously alluded to would attempt to debunk this by pointing out that creative software inventors don’t hold the same appeal to women. It turns out that Gregory Feist has studied this phenomenon, drawing a distinction between ornamental-aesthetic and applied-technological forms of creativity. Guess which types causes the girls to drop panties?
Humor is such a strong attraction cue that it deserves special mention. Both sexes want intelligence and humor in a potential mate, and they are highly correlated. Interestingly, men prefer women who laugh at their jokes, while women prefer men who make them laugh. Women frequently rank funny men as superior potential partners, viewing them as “friendly, fun and popular.” Studies have also found that the amount of laughter in an initial conversation between two people strongly predicts the level of mutual sexual attraction.
Humor
Humor is such a strong attraction cue that it deserves special mention. Both sexes want intelligence and humor in a potential mate, and they are highly correlated. Interestingly, men prefer women who laugh at their jokes, while women prefer men who make them laugh. Women frequently rank funny men as superior potential partners, viewing them as “friendly, fun and popular.” Studies have also found that the amount of laughter in an initial conversation between two people strongly predicts the level of mutual sexual attraction.
What humor signals:
Playfulness
Insight
Creativity
Openness to experience
Extraversion
Sociability
Kaufman and Geher go so far as to say that humor ability belongs in the mating intelligence hall of fame. They cite humor as the most likely ability to catapult a male to a high level of social dominance. Women don’t like aggressive men, but the funny guy lives by his wits and the laughter he generates is powerful social proof.
Pick-Up Lines
The research on cold approaches is fascinating and far more insightful than typical pickup artist claptrap. A study by Bale, Morrison and Caryl employed a variety of “chat-up lines” among college students in Edinburgh and found that the most effective approaches were ones where the male displayed (not in order):
The least effective gambits were ones that included:
The least effective gambits were ones that included:
Requests for sex
Sexually based humor
Making fun of the woman, i.e. negging
Scripted opening gambits taken from PUA websites
Pre-planned jokes and one-liners were not effective, presumably because they do not demonstrate intelligence. Women were easily able to distinguish “spontaneous jokes that fit the context exactly.”
However – this is interesting – the researchers also suggest that cads using cheesy or sexually charged pickup lines successfully weed out women with a long-term mating orientation, and are left with women open to the possibility of a one-night stand. Pick-up lines serve the purpose of pairing people with similar mating orientations. The study refers to this as a short-term fling vs. long-term committed relationship orientation, generally referred to here as unrestricted vs. restricted sociosexuality. So in that sense the pickup lines work.
Men and women viewed these pickup lines very differently, however.
Men underestimated female attraction to lines demonstrating wealth and helpfulness. They overestimated the appeal of sexual content or innuendo, as well as over the top displays of talent, i.e. peacocking.
Guitars have magic of their own, though. In one study, a random hottie approached women on the street under three conditions and asked for their phone number. With guitar, he got the number 31% of the time, with nothing he got it 15% of the time, and with a sports bag only 9%.
In another study a good looking guy sent out Facebook requests to female strangers. When his picture included a guitar, 28% accepted his friend request. No guitar? Just 10%.
For women, direct openers are most effective, because it makes it easier for the male to gauge interest. There was no stigma found among males at the prospect of being approached directly by women who ask for a date, provide a phone number, etc.
Now you know why you find the guy in skinny jeans with jutting hipbones sexy if he’s musical, or funny, or creative in his presentation. And I know why I fell for my husband so fast.
